There is a sign on the door of the boiler room in our villa which reads, 'In the interests of safety, even where space permits, the boiler room must not be used to sleep in.' Bearing in mind that the room in question is a rather bleak L shaped one that is approximately a meter at it's longest end, I don't even want to imagine what happened historically to prompt the management to deem this warning necessary.
The bike riding today, once I got the hang of it, was actually rather fun, even without the fag and beer. It didn't even occur to me that the last time I rode a bike I was 10 or so, so it took a while to get going. Not before looking like a complete eejit that is, as kids three times younger raced past on theirs, while I struggled with takeoff. Julia was less impressed having to sit in her little covered trailer and did a lot of moaning. It was only when we took her out at lunch that we realised they'd given us one with a wet seat bench and her trousers were soaked through. On a hot day, no problem, but when it's coldish and raining, well, rather unpleasant. I probably don't need to spell out what I felt like doing to the spotty 16-year-old (all people younger than 30 appear 16 to me) that arranged that trailer for us.
We have yet to hit the water park - that's on tomorrow's agenda. We did walk past it however, and it seemed that adult and child alike were completely oblivious to the rain as they zooted past on the fun slide screaming like banshees. Adults behaving like children on these sorts of contraptions make me nervous. There's something of the maniac about them, and although it's one thing having a kid bash into you as you make your descent, I imagine a 14 stone man doing the same may result in some serious chiropractor bills.
I ensured I bought a pair of board shorts so as to not expose people to the sight of my extremely pale ample thighs. I'd like to use the excuse that I've just had a baby, but as she's nearly 9 months old, I imagine people thinking, 'Yeah right, that excuse expired about 5 months ago.'
Just a few more notes on the place, as a reference for people who may be interested in coming here: The towels provided for one's toilette, although thin, are nice and soft. These do not get replaced every day however. Now I now a bunch of you reading this will get all eco on me and say 'You don't need fresh towels every day,' and normally I would agree with you. But when you have a baby and um, er, maybe use the towels as changing mats, well, you get the picture. I believe there is a laundrette in town and one would most likely also be able to get fresh towels, but at an additional cost.
We signed up for the maid service, but to be frank, I have no idea what that involves because the only noticeable change to our villa on our return is that the bed was made, and badly. That's it. So I think that that's a complete waste of time and money, and as these places come kitted out with dishwashers, I'd just lump it and do the tidying and cleaning myself.
As I write this Roberto has just removed a pan from the cupboard (prior to this unused, by us that is) to make some bacon in and said, and I quote, "Jesus Christ, I'm not using this, it's filthy, and the non-stick surface is peeling off!" And this is a man who isn't anywhere near my levels of hygiene obsessive compulsiveness. So yes, not really sure what that maid gets up to, if anything at all.
We ate in Strada today (for non UK people this is an Italian-themed restaurant chain). They had this little soft play area (this whole place is a dream if you have kids), and Julia was enjoying herself in it while we ate our main course. Then she was joined by two small children, one 19 months, the other 2 years. The mother of the two-year-old kept warning him to be gentle with Julia as she was only little, that is until Julia herself started to use the 19-month-old as a ladder, while the poor child looked terrified. We managed to scoop her up and out of there just before she managed to extract the handful of said child's hair she had in her possession. Little indeed.
And now, dinner awaits and it's time to sign off. More tomorrow, provided of course I survive the rigorous of the water park.