Alexis versus Krystal - again!

You've got to love Joan Collins. The woman is not afraid of going there, and this story personifies the adage, 'Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned'. Last year she teamed up on stage with her old Dynasty nemesis Linda Evans to play a pair of has-been Hollywood stars that are still at each other's throats.

Well it turns out it wasn't much of an act, and the two women, how should we put this, weren't that fond of each other.

Collins kept a personal diary throughout the production, and the excerpts are very funny and need I say, biting.

Here are a few of my favourites:

I'm not thrilled when Ben suggests Linda Evans to play Leatrice. We starred together for nine years in the TV series Dynasty - she played saintly Krystal and I played bitchy Alexis.However, I'm convinced she's always disliked me, since she rarely spoke to me on set. Ben tells me that he's talked to Linda and "she's (pause) fond of you"."I don't believe her," I say. "She needs the work, and for God's sake, she's never been on stage at all - and she wasn't even that good on TV!

Late August 2006: New York Linda arrives at first rehearsal with cosmetic-surgery tape over and under her eyelids and underneath her chin.Naturally, the cast all pretend to ignore this, but it's obvious she's come straight from either the face-lift shop or a car crash.She also has the weirdest collagen-enhanced lips I've ever seen. In fact, she epitomises the expression 'trout pout', with those huge lips that make her look like a gargoyle when she smiles. It's quite off-putting to have to look at that face, which used to be so pretty, and pretend not to notice. Everyone who sees Linda is shocked by how she's spoiled her looks.

Linda says: "I love to fight. Barbara Stanwyck taught me to do my own stunts. I don't do car crashes or falling off buildings, but fighting with another woman is not a problem for me." Well, ha, ha, and thanks, Linda - but this woman was taught by Gene Kelly never to do your own stunts."Firstly," he told me, "it's dangerous, and second, you're putting some poor stunt girl out of work."So I subscribe to the Kelly theory - or have done ever since twice ending up in hospital after an over-enthusiastic bout of cat-fighting with Krystal on Dynasty.

Once, in our infamous lily-pond fight, she pulled my leg so hard that it was practically dislocated; and, another time, I ended up in the emergency ward with a dislocated neck vertebra.

Read more here.

Original tip: Dlisted
Photo & source: Daily Mail